Life Is All About Choices...

Life is always full of challenges.

But Alhamdulillah, life always offer us with choices for every obstacles and every challenges that we face in life. It all depends on us to make the decision coz we have been gifted with our thinking capabilities as human being.

At the age of 30s (or even at the age of early 20s), we are already wise enough to make our own decision. Maybe not really wise in our late teenage years, I think.. (I still didn't know which course to choose after my SPM, either Polymer Engineering, Chemical Engineering or Electrical Engineering!:-))

I can still remember when I was 13 years old, I was "forced" by my parents to continue my studies in a boarding school. Well, at that point of time, I was so naive and couldn't make my own decision wisely (only now I had realised that..) Alhamdulillah, my parents had made that decision for me to stay in the boarding school despite my homesickness for the first few weeks (thank you, Abah & Mak!:-))

What decision have you made in your life recently?

Whatever decision that we make in life, do remember that our life is too precious to be wasted.

If we start to feel unhappy about our life, stop and think for a while.. "Do we have other alternatives?" "Can I change my current situation?" There is always alternatives for every situation. Always make decision for our own happiness. Nevertheless, once in a while, we have to also consider happiness of other people around us too, especially those people that we love.

Bottom line is, we must know our priorities in life to help us make any decision. If we have conflicting priorities, for example our work and our family, there is always a way (InsyaAllah) that we can work around it. Plan so that we can still satisfy our first priority without having to sacrifice the other priority. We may have to do some sacrifice here.. (like doing our office work during our vacation, maybe?)

Whatever it is, make the best out of this precious life of ours...

~Ummu Yusra~
5.01am
Kuala Lumpur

"We Complement Each Other".. Princess Story

Long time ago, there lived a beautiful Princess in Scotland, who wished for a charming, handsome Prince to marry her. Besides the needs to have good outside appearance, she also had one long list of behaviour and characters that she wanted her future husband to have. She wanted her husband to be exactly like her..  

Everyday, one Prince would be scheduled to see her at the Palace, wanted to try their luck.

Unfortunately, all of them had failed.. No one really matched her stringent requirement. 

Time passed by...

Every Prince around the world already came to the Palace and tried their luck...

But the Princess still unhappy with all of them and they left the Palace feeling very disappointed..

Time passed by.. and no other Prince ever came to the Palace again..

In the end, the (old) Princess remained unmarried at her last breath, feeling unhappy for not meeting the husband that she wanted..

Moral of the story:

In our life journey, we will never find anyone, who are exactly the same as us.   

Everyone has his/her own strengths and weaknesses..

This really applies for husband and wife relationship..

Do you notice that if the wife likes to talk, her husband would be more of a thinking type (or the other way round).  If the husband is of a friendly type, his wife would be more of a reserved type.  

And their other characters remain opposite to each other..

But there is  nothing to worry about it. All of us has our own strengths and weaknesses.

Despite having the weaknesses at the beginning of their mariage, sooner or later, each would learn from their life partner's strengths and have the inner urge to overcome their weaknesses, naturally... 

So next time, if you are thinking why your husband/ wife is not having your own character/ behaviour that you really wished they have, do remember that husbands and wives do complement each other.. That makes life beautiful and interesting... (but of course you can also pray in your heart that he/she would change one day.. :-))

As for the Princess, she had really missed many golden opportunities in her life journey to make her life happier..

~The End~

Written by Ummu Yusra

You Can Be The Happiest Woman In The World

Very inspiring... 

With your beauty, you are better than the sun; with your morals you are more sublime than musk; with your modesty you are nobler than the full moon; with your compassion you a more beneficial than rain. So, preserve your beauty with faith, your tranquility with contentment, your chastity with hijab. 

Remember that your adornment is not gold, silver or diamond, rather, it is two rak'ahs at Fajr going thirsty when you fast for Allah, concealed charity which no one knows except Him, hot tears that wash away sin, a lengthy prostration born of utter submission to Allah, shyness before Allah when the inclination to do evil overwhelms you.

Clothe yourself with the garments of taqwa (piety) for you are the most beautiful woman in the world, even if your clothes are shabby. Clothe yourself with cloak of modesty, for you are the most beautiful woman in the world even if you are barefoot.

O' sincere Muslim, O' believing woman who constantly turns to Allah, the Exalted, be like the palm tree and rise above evil and harm; if a stone is thrown at the palm tree, it lets its fruit drop (and does not retaliate). It remains green summer and winter, and gives many benefits. Do not lower yourself to the level of trivial matters, and rise above all that may damage your modesty and honour.

A man had an argument with his wife and said, "I am going to make your life miserable." The wife calmly replied, "You cannot do that." He said, "Why not?" She said: "If happiness were to be found in money or jewellery, you could deprive me of it and take it away from me, but it is nothing over which you or any other person has control. I find happiness in my faith, and my faith is in my heart, and no one has power over it except my Lord."

The One Who created happiness is the Most Gracious, Most Merciful, so how can you seek happiness from anyone other than Him? If people had control over happiness, there would be no deprived or grieving person left on earth.

"Do not give up on yourself, because change is usually slow; you will encounter obstacles that will discourage you, but do not let these obstacles defeat you."

"Your gold is your religion, your adornment is your moral attitude, and your wealth is your good manners."

"When distress strikes and calamities come one after another, then say: La ilaha illallah."

"Do not make your problems the subject of conversations with others, for by doing so you create a barrier between yourself and happiness."

"The most sincere generosity comes from those who do not have anything but recognise the value of a kind word and a smile, How many people give, but it is as if they are giving a slap."

"The most difficult time could be made easier by the smile of a confident person."

"Prepare for the worst, then you will feel that things are getting better."

"Be happy now, today, not tomorrow."

"Frustration is your worst enermy, for it has the power to destroy peace of mind."

"Your happiness does not depend on anyone else, rather, it is in your hands."

"Yesterday is a dream that has gone and tomorrow is merely a beautiful hope. Only today is real."

"Physical well-being comes from eating little, mental well-being comes from sinning little, well-being of the heart comes from worrying little and well-being of the tongue comes from speaking little."

"Men regret speaking, but he will never regret silence."

"In order to be beautiful, your thoughts should be so."

"Man finds happiness in a word that comes from the lips of a woman."

"The strongest fortress is a righteous woman."

"If a beautiful woman is a jewel, a righteous woman is a treasure."

"The best thing a man can have is a faithful wife."

"Be beautiful and you will see the world beautiful."

"A wise man said: 'I have never regretted what I did not say, but I have often regretted what I did say.' "

"Do not wait to be happy so that you smile but smile to be happy."

"Be optimistic, even if you are in the eye of the storm."

"Soon the flowers will bloom, grief will depart and happiness will prevail."

"Sickness is a message in which there is a glad tiding; and good health is a garment that has a price."

"Plant a tasbih (saying Subhan Allah) in a second , an idea in a minute, and a deed in an hour."

"Control your thoughts and you will be happy."

"The successful woman is supplicated for, praised by her husband, loved by her neighbours and respected by her friends."

"Wipe away the tears of the orphan in order to attain the pleasure of the Most Merciful and a house in Paradise."

"Prayer is guaranteed to bring tranquillity and chase away worry."

"Buy with charity the du'a' and love of the poor and needy."

"Allah loves those who repent and turn to Him."

"Giving up sin is Jihad (fighting in Allah's Cause), but persisting in it is stubbornness."

"In the sound heart there is no room for shirk (polytheism), deceit, rancour or envy."

"The wise woman turns a desert into a beautiful garden."

"Futile arguments and trivial discussions take away the sense of peace and tranquillity."

"Wherever you go and find darkness in your life; what you have to do is to light the lamp within yourself."

"Changing from bad to good is a long-term adventure, but it is wonderful."

"If you give in to despair, you will learn nothing and you will never find happiness."

"Check your past and your present, for life is a sequence of experiences from which one should emerge victorious."

"Do not be content to have some dark areas in your life, for the light is there; all you have to do is to turn it on and see it shining."

"Stop regretting your sin and think about the good deeds with which you are going to replace it."

"Happiness exists in you and you should focus your efforts on yourself."

"We need money in order to live but that does not mean that we need to live for the sake of money."

"Cast away all discouraging thoughts that make you feel helpless, and focus on success, then you will never fail."

"If you fail in one of your deeds, you should not give in to despair; do not worry and never doubt that you will find a solution."

"Do not complain about your problems except to those who can help you with advice and kind words."

"Learn how to co-exist with fear and it will disappear."

"Do not worry about things that you cannot perform, rather, spend time on improving what you can improve."

"Be happy with what is in your hand, content with whatever Allah has decreed and give up all daydreams that do not suit your efforts and abilities."

"If you have made mistakes in the past, learn from them, then let them go."

"Self-confidence means finding meaning in life regardless of your age; and being able to gain more from life."

"Regret cannot salvage a ship from the bottom of the sea."

"The value of life is to live every minute of it."

"We cannot change the past or draw the future as we want. Why should we kill ourselves regretting something that we cannot change?"

"There is nothing difficult or impossible in life so long as you are able to work and move."

"There is one way that leads to happiness: stop being worried about the things beyond your control."

"Always bear in mind the picture of success and keep it alive in your mind."

"Thinking of happiness will inevitably lead to thinking of what comes before and after, and that, in itself, spoils the sense of happiness."

"Of quickest message of happiness to others is a sincere smile from the heart."

"The way to happiness is in front of you, so seek it by means of knowledge, righteous deeds and a good attitude. Be moderate in all your affairs and you will be happy."

"The greatest blessing is goodness in the soul which makes one happy."

"Count Allah's blessings upon you, not your problems."

"Real beauty lies in beautiful behaviour, manners and mind"

"Foul tongues causes more trouble to their owners than to their victims."

"The happiest man is the one who makes the largest number of people happy."

"The wise man seeks to benefit from wise opinions; he never despairs or gives up thinking and trying."

"Frustration is your worst enemy, for it has the power to destroy peace of mind."

- Author: DR. 'A'id al Qarni

"How To Be Happy" - a Short Poem...

We visited Call Of the Wild in Gaylord, Michigan last Thursday. In the middle of many waxed animals found in Michigan, there was a small exhibition corner, which has a collection of short poems hanging on the wall. I came across this little poem, "How To Be Happy" by an anonymous author.  It is a very simple principle, which I have neglected all of my life.  

Hopefully, I would still have the chance to change to a new leaf and always be considerate & helpful to others...

90/10 Rules... Stay Happy & Healthy

The following interesting article, which I received via email a few years back was written by Stephen Covey.  He mentions about a powerful life tool that we can apply in our life journey. 90/10 principle can assist us to stay happy and stay healthy too!  Actually, it can be related to one important virtue that we need to have as Muslim i.e. PATIENCE...  

Here goes:

Discover the 90/10 Principle.  

It will change your life (at least the way you react to situations).

What is this principle? 10% of life is made up of what happens to you. 90% of life is decided by how you react.

What does this mean? We really have no control over 10% of what happens to us.

We cannot stop the car from breaking down. The plane will be late arriving, which throws our whole schedule off. A driver may cuts us off in traffic.

We have no control over this 10%. The other 90% is different. You determine the 90%.  

How?...... By your reaction.

You cannot control a red light.. but you can control your reaction. Don’t let people fool you; YOU can control how you react.

Let’s use an example.

You are eating breakfast with your family. Your daughter knocks off over a cup of coffee onto your business shirt. You have no control over what just happened.

What happens next will be determined by how you react.

You curse.

You harshly scold your daughter for knocking the cup over. She breaks down in tears. After scolding her, you turn to your spouse and criticize her for placing the cup too close to the edge of the table. A short verbal battle follows. You storm upstairs and change your shirt. Back downstairs, you find your daughter has been too busy crying to finish breakfast and get ready for school. She misses the bus.

Your spouse must leave immediately for work. You rush to the car and drive your daughter to school. Because you are late, you drive 40 miles an hour in a 30 mph speed limit.

After a 15-minute delay and throwing $60 traffic fine away, you arrive at school. Your daughter runs into the building without saying goodbye. After arriving at the office 20 minutes late, you find you forgot your briefcase. Your day has started terrible. As it continues, it seems to get worse and worse. You look forward to coming home.  

When you arrive home, you find small wedge in your relationship with your spouse and daughter.

Why?... Because of how you reacted this morning.

Why did you have a bad day?
A) Did the coffee cause it?
B) Did your daughter cause it?
C) Did the policeman cause it?
D) Did you cause it?

The answer is “D”.

You had no control over what happened with the coffee. How you reacted in the first 5 seconds is what caused your bad day.  

Here is what could have and should have happened.

Coffee splashes over you. Your daughter is about to cry. You gently says, “It’s okay, honey. You just need to be more careful next time.” Grabbing a towel you rush upstairs. After grabbing a new shirt and your briefcase, you come back down in time to look through the window and see you child getting on the bus. She turns and waves. You arrive 5 minutes early and cheerfully greet the staff. Your boss comments on how good the day you are having.

Notice the difference?

Two different scenarios. Both started the same. Both ended different.

Why?

Because of how you REACTED.

You really do not have any control over 10% of what happens. The other 90% is determined by your reaction.

Here are some ways to apply the 90/10 principle. If someone says something negative about you, don’t be a sponge. Let the attack roll off like water on glass. You don’t have to let the negative comment affect you!

React properly and it will not ruin your day. A wrong reaction could result in losing a friend, being fired, getting stressed out, etc.

How do you react if someone cuts you off you in traffic? Do you lose your temper? Pound on the steering wheel? (A friend of mine had the steering wheel fall off). Do you curse? Does your blood pressure skyrocket? Do you try and bump them?

Who cares if you arrive ten seconds later at work? Why let the cars ruin your drive?  

Remember the 90/10 principle, and do not worry about it.

You are told you lost your job.

Why lose sleep and get irritated? It will work out. Use your worrying energy and time into finding another job.

The plane is late; it is going to mangle your schedule for the day. Why take outpour frustration on the flight attendant? She has no control over what is going on.

Use your time to study, get to know the other passenger. Why get stressed out? It will just make things worse.

Now you know the 90/10 principle. Apply it and you will be amazed by the results. You will lose nothing if you try it. The 90/10 principle is incredible. Very few know and apply this principle.

The result?  

Millions of people are suffering from undeserved stress, trials, problems and heartache. We all must understand and apply the 90/10 principle.  

It CAN change your life!!!

Wonderful principle, isn't it? Have you ever had any experience using this rule? Do share with me if you don't mind.. :-)

Happiness Is In Our Mind.. A Story Of The Old Wise Man

Residence Inn, Des Plaines

Have you heard a story of The Old Wise Man? It is a very touching story which teaches us about the meaning of happiness. It does not depend on how much money that we have in our bank account or how big is our house, etc. But what's more important is how we see it in our mind. Alhamdulillah, this is something that we can control ourselves, irregardless of the conditions that we are having or surroundings that we are currently in.

Here's the story:

A man of 92 years, short, very well-presented, who takes great care in his appearance, is moving into an old people's home today. His wife of 70 has recently died, and he is obliged to leave his home. After waiting several hours in the retirement home lobby, he gently smiles as he is told that his room is ready. As he slowly walks to the elevator, using his cane, I describe his small room to him, including the sheet hung at the window which serves as a curtain.

"I like it very much", he says, with the enthusiasm of an 8 year old boy who has just been given a new puppy.

M. Gagne, you haven't even seen the room yet, hang on a moment, we are almost there.

"That has nothing to do with it", he replies.

"Happiness is something I choose in advance. Whether or not I like the room does not depend on the furniture, or the decos - rather it depends on how I decide to see it."

"It is already decided in my mind that I like my room. It is a decision I take every morning when I wake up."

"I can choose. I can spend my day in bed enumerating all the difficulties that I have with the parts of my body that no longer work very well, or I can get up and give thanks to heaven for those parts that are still in working order."

"Every day is a gift, and as long as I can open my eyes, I will focus on the new day, and all the happy memories that I have built up during my life."

"Old age is like a bank account. You withdraw in later life what you have deposited along the way."

"So, my advice to you is to deposit all the happiness you can in your bank account of memories."

"Thank you for your part in filling my account with happy memories, which I am still continuing to fill..."

Very touching, isn't it?

InsyaAllah I will always try to remember these 5 simple guidelines for happiness:

1- Free my heart from hatred
2- Free my mind from worry
3- Live simply
4- Give more
5- Expect less

Kind of hard actually but I will try my very best for my own happiness. But most important of all, always pray to our Creator to bless us with happiness in our heart.. :-)